Powerful and deep post

Read this post at your own risk....it reflects very deep movements in my soul.

Last night I was lying in bed, musing about various things....one of which surprised me. I was angry....angry that God has done so much in my life and in the lives of those I know. And then it hit me....I want to be an atheist. At one level, obviously, I am an atheist in the sense that I don't have faith in (trusting, relying on) Christ. My life is mostly godless and therefore, atheism is my current way of life. However, I want to be another kind of atheist. The justified kind. And I cannot!!! I cannot get away from what God has done. And I always come back to seeing that and his call to actually live out the authentic Good News, that we can be like Jesus Christ, in my life!!! He keeps drawing me back toward the Kingdom life.